British 90s nostalgia and shite

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I like Goodnight Moon. I like how the little rabbit does his best to find excuses to stay awake, saying 'goodnight' to everyone and everything he can think of.

There are a few creepy bits though.

The three bears

Take these three bears for instance.

Is it just me or does this look like couples therapy? The bear on the right is obviously the therapist. She's listening patiently to the bear in the middle, who's explaining why her husband is a complete and utter dick.

Either that or it's an asylum. Look at the bears' wide, bulging eyes, and the way two of the bears are clutching themselves. I can imagine them rocking back and forth and mumbling about the coming of Armageddon.

Goodnight nobody

Then there's this page:

That's not creepy. That's not creepy at all.

Now excuse me while I go close the curtains and make sure all the doors are locked.

The dollhouse

Another creepy thing is the dollhouse. On the last page, the lights come on by themselves.

I imagine all the dolls come alive at night. But it's okay because I just imagine there are club beat noises coming from it as though there's a party.

The red balloon

Then there's the red balloon. It looks just like the balloon from Stephen King's It.

Where did the balloon come from? Why is it hovering halfway between the ceiling and the floor?

The mouse

This albino mouse, possibly a ghost mouse, with a huge gaping hole where its eye should be.

The quiet old lady

Then there's the quiet old lady. She sits in a rocking chair, knits and occasionally says, "Hush".

I don't actually find her scary. I find her comforting. It's nice to have an adult in the room when you're a child falling asleep. It keeps the monsters away.

Some people claim the old lady is actually a ghost or a corpse. Take this passage from The Guardian for instance:

In the corner of the room is a dead rabbit. Now, the rabbit might be stuffed, or it might have just been killed in its chair and abandoned, but it is unquestionably dead.

"Unquestionably dead"? She says "hush"; dead people don't say "hush", so she's not dead. Well, okay, she might be a ghost, but she's not dead for certain. So fix your fucking article, The Guardian.

Goodnight Moon and its sequel, My World, are available to buy at Amazon.